Clanty

carry-on-wayward-sister:

marzipanandminutiae:

yggidee:

uovoc:

blueelectricangels:

vr-trakowski:

hermitknut:

anassarhenisch:

skygemspeaks:

someone recommend me some good fantasy books that aren’t centred on a war, please, my crops are dying

The Greta Helsing novels by Vivian Shaw - practical doctor to the undead defeats mildly ominous interdimensional threats with the aid of domestic vampires and a demon accountant.

Sunshine by Robin McKinley - practical baker is captured by vampires, escapes, reluctantly teams up with better vampire to kill the bad one.

Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones - young hat maker ages 60 years overnight, proceeds to upend the life of a disaster wizard while learning self-confidence.

the Discworld novels by Terry Pratchett - hard to encapsulate, but equally funny and hard-hitting, tackling race and gender and corruption and other forms of inequality while also, like, making fun of post offices and Hollywood and Shakespeare. Three or four tackle war, true, but there’s something like 35 others to choose from.

the Accidental Turn series by J.M. Frey - recent Ph.D of colour lands in the Fantasyland™ she did her thesis on, goes off about agency and diversity while recovering from the Dark Lord’s attentions and learning the truth about her fictional crush.

Middlegame by Seanan McGuire - evil alchemist creates superpowered children to assist world takeover; children just want to be a family; family is complicated.

Spinning Silver by Naomi Novik - young woman takes over family business, must outwit fairies with a love of gold.

the Enchanted Forest Chronicles by Patricia C. Wrede - princess runs away to become a dragon’s housekeeper, fights off rescuers, solves problems large and small, melts wizards.

the October Daye novels by Seanan Mcguire - Half-fae detective solves murders, finds missing persons, develops found family, can’t stop self from upending the social order.

The Golem and the Djinni by Helene Wecker - A quiet golem, a tempestuous djinn, Gilded Age New York. Immigrants, identity, friendship, hope, and self-discovery.

An Unkindness of Magicians by Kat Howard - A witch from an outsider House enters New York’s magical Hunger Games, to prove a point. The problems of magic were not intended.

Zoo City by Lauren Beukes - Part-time con artist gets hired to find two missing pop stars, with the help of the magical sloth on her back. Noir ensues.

Child of a Hidden Sea by A.M. Dellamonica - Nature photographer lands on water-world, discovers lost family, tries to convince self magic is impossible.

Gods Behaving Badly by Marie Phillips - Greek gods, washed up in North London, curse Apollo to fall for the cleaner. Existential crisis, meet rom-com.

Among Others by Jo Walton - Loner teen sent to boarding school, discovers science fiction, might know fairies and do magic.

Tooth and Claw by Jo Walton - Austenesque story except all the characters are dragons.

Every Heart a Doorway (and sequels) by Seanan McGuire - the children of portal fantasy end up in boarding school coping with being kicked out of their various worlds, then some of them start getting murdered. 

The Gracekeepers by Kirsty Logan - the world is flooded, there’s a lady who works with a bear at a circus that sails to different places to perform, and a lady who is sort of an undertaker, and they fall in love

Lud-in-the-Mist by Hope Mirrlees - there are fairies but no one talks about them anymore because That’s Just Not How We Are except this state of affairs cannot possibly last and people start getting lured to fairyland

The Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison - fifth son of emperor who’s lived his whole life away from court abruptly becomes emperor when his father and older brothers are killed in an accident, spends entire book trying to make friends and figure how the fuck to do a) confidence and b) ruling ethically

The Various by Steven Augarde - girl spends summer at uncle’s farm, finds the group of “various” (no direct parallel, but think somewhere between gnomes and pixies) that live in the woods, mysterious history, flying horse, The Cat Is Evil (this is technically middle grade but it’s so good I can’t even)

Turning Darkness Into Light by Marie Brennan - working on the translation of an ancient text is complicated when it might have a huge impact on the public perception of a highly stigmatised group; subterfuge, found family, mythology, and the rejection of men who steal other people’s work. 

So You Want to Be a Wizard or Stealing the Elf-King’s Roses by Diane Duane.  

Tam Lin, Juniper Gentian and Rosemary, and The Secret Country by Pamela Dean (all different stories).  

The Spellkey by Ann Downer.  

Swordheart  or Summer in Orcus by T. Kingfisher.  

The Curse of Chalion or the Penric series by Lois McMaster Bujold.

Green Year Dragonfly by Kaye Bellot.  

If by “no war” you mean “no or not focused on violence”:

The Terrier/Bloodhound/Mastiff series by Tamora Pierce
Teenage former street rat aspires to and joins law enforcement in pseudo-medieval fantasy land, proves to have moral code forged of adamantium and more determination than an entire battalion. Also talks to unquiet ghosts carried by pigeons.

the Winding Circle books by Tamora Pierce (with the exception of Battle Magic)
Four teenagers are snatched from the jaws of peril, discover they have incredibly strong yet overlooked magical powers, slowly become a found family, survive an earthquake, pirates, forest fires, plague, and puberty.

The Keeper Chronicles, by Tanya Huff
Magic user accidentally gets roped into running a boarding house in Toronto. The decor is from the 50s, the handyman is an incredibly handsome and pureminded myopic Newfoundlander, and there is a (literal) portal to Hell in the basement. The third book adds lesbians and a mall that eats street kids to the mix. (Enchantment Emporium and its sequels are in the same world btw)

——————————————————————

If by “no war” you legitimately just mean that war is not the driving plot force:

the Hawk and Fisher books by Simon R Green 
Fairytale-destined prince and princess decide that destiny is bullshit, ditch their kindgoms, become the only honest pseudo-cops in fantasy-Gotham because strangely being a prince/princess doesn’t actually give you life skills that are not applicable to being a mercenary. Buildings eat people, gods are murdered, street drugs turn people into animals, Hawk and Fisher are so very tired.

Oath of Swords and its sequels, by David Weber

Guy from a species generally (unfairly) derided by “civilized people” as barbaric and evil thinks he’s going mad, but actually he’s been chosen as paladin by a god and he’s just stubbornly refusing to listen. Continues to go off and do heroic shit while doing the equivalent of jamming his fingers in his ears and saying “LA LA LA”. This does absolutely nothing to dissuade the god in question.

The Thief, by Megan Whalen Turner
A thief’s prison sentence is cut short when he is sent on a mission to steal an important (and magical?) object for the King. BIG plot twist at the end. Imagine going on a fun road trip through the fantasy pseudo-Byzantine Empire, except that all your fellow travelers have their own secret agendas.

The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August, by Catherine Webb 
In this universe, there are a handful of time travelers –  people who are forced to live the same life over and over, retaining their memories with each rebirth.  As Harry nears the end of his eleventh life, a little girl appears at his bedside with the following message: the end of the world is getting faster.

Dark Lord of Derkholm, by Diana Wynne Jones
The citizens of a fantasy world are getting really tired of being overrun by non-magical tourists from our world. This year, the role of Evil Wizard falls to Derk, who wants nothing more than to be left in peace on his farm/magical genetic engineering laboratory. Derk’s 2 human children, 5 griffin children, and 1 enchantress wife feel much the same. Wouldn’t it be a shame if someone were to sabotage this planet’s shitty contract once and for all? 

(For personal records)

The Athena Club series, by Theodora Goss
Daughters and/or female creations of mad scientists from 19th-century literature team up to figure out what their “fathers” were up to and what, exactly, the secret society that seems to control all such experiments intends to do next. Sort of an all-female League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, in the best way. Kind of an odd frame narrative, but you get used to it pretty quickly.

The Ruby Red Trilogy by Kerstin Gier

Love, Time travel, secret societies, and a dark secret at the heart of a prophecy.

Skulduggery Pleasant by Derek Landy

A hidden world of magic wielders in modern day Ireland, a skeleton detective and his associate solving crimes, a race of Gods trying to conquer the world, and a dark prophecy declaring the end of all things. This one does have battles in every book but it isn’t your classical war.

Chronicles of Ancient Darkness by Michelle Paver

Set in a time when the woods were still dark and dangerous (European Bronze Age, most likely Finland), a boy and his wolf friend have to survive beasts and other clans. Includes Demons, Soul Eaters, Spirit Walkers, and Changelings.

(via saturdaysky)

daily–cats:

(via oh-great-authoress)

cuteness–overload:

The call center cat

(via jadedmeatbag)

newgodpho:

(via sapphicnerd)

darkersolstice:

mentalisttraceur:

cicadianrhythm:

2ndgengeek:

corpish:

I’m convinced it was an interdimensional portal

Oooh, I know this one! The FAA (Federal Aviation Administration - they make the rules for flying here in the US) has designated “roads” in the sky to keep all the commercial jets from running into each other. When you’re headed the same direction at the same speed, you don’t get in each other’s way. If you’re heading east you fly at one elevation, and west-bound planes fly at a different height. There are lots of rules to keep mid-air crashes to a minimum.

However, if you’re running late, or weather in one spot is bad, you can call up Air Traffic Control and ask for a new route! And they will look at their little radar screens and maps of all the airplanes in the area, and tell you what shortcut you can take.

I am a little bit overcome by this. We made actual imaginary tunnels in the sky so our giant metal birds can fly through the open air in the most organized, polite way possible. We check in over our designated long distance thought projection machine channel that anyone can listen in on but we all promise not to interrupt to get permission to swap imaginary sky tunnels. We come up with the weirdest impossible shit and immediately give it boundaries! Humans are ridiculous. I mean yes these are good rules and many many people would die if we didnt have them, a+ on these rules, but if you take a step back wanting to sunder every natural limitation we can find and then going ahead and building our own so nothing gets too messy is a fucking hilarious art for a species to compulsively pursue.

It is extremely important that you all understand that we didn’t pursue it compulsively. We have never pursued it compulsively. We were forced to pursue it by the mangling of bodies and metal over our heads as planes flew into each other.

Humans are not built to see and predict hurling planes, tiny among a vast sky. People knew this. Pilots had close calls. Those with the right amount of caution told anyone who would listen about how it is possible to not see another plane until after it hit you, and maybe we should do something about it. And we still had “see and avoid, otherwise feel free to have fun with it” flight rules until it killed people.

It used to be normal for flights to swing and circle around a bit at a whim to give passengers a better view or whatever. So normal that what eventually happened was inevitable, predictable, and it still had to actually happen before humanity learned.

We built those imaginary sky tunnels out of lives.

We could’ve built them with foresight and caution instead. But most people neglect, ignore, and dismiss very unlikely things as if they can’t happen, instead of systematically making them actually unable to happen.

Mind that cognetic opening or the next thing will need lives to build too.

“It used to be normal for flights to swing and circle around a bit at a whim to give passengers a better view or whatever. So normal that what eventually happened was inevitable, predictable, and it still had to actually happen before humanity learned.”

BOAC Flight 911, Air New Zealand Flight 901

Then there are the mid-air collisions:

1956 Grand Canyon mid-air collision, 1960 New York mid-air collision

One of the reasons I love air disaster podcasts (as opposed to, say, true crime) is the way many of them focus on “what did this incident do to make flying safer for us all in the future.” That 1956 crash? It led to funding for Air Traffic Controllers and giving them military-grade radar systems. A 1958 collision between a civilian and a military airplane led to the FAA being given control over all US airways–civilian and military.

The rules are written in lives. May they be enough this time.

(via super-rangers)

catchymemes:

songsofwaterandnight:

huffylemon:

damn ok lake superior

Ok yeah that lake is superior

(via fluent-in-lesbianism)

cumaeansibyl:

carnivalseb:

secondlina:

raychleadele:

thetattedstoner:

Everybody || Backstreet Boys

Just occurred to me that some of you may have never seen this music video. They had absolutely no reason to make it the way it is but damn they went hard.

One of the backstreet boys in 1997 : no I’m TELLING you, monster fuckers are the future.

oh my god. it’s back again

I’ve seen actual horror movies with less impressive production design.

(via vinceaddams)

brawltogethernow:

my-nameis-jasper-deactivated202:

supreme-leader-stoat:

skiplo-wave:

my-nameis-jasper-deactivated202:

my-nameis-jasper-deactivated202:

my-nameis-jasper-deactivated202:

I asked my kids if they’d prefer a secret garden or a secret library and my son shook his head and was like “I don’t trust the secret gardeners and librarians”

Me: what if there aren’t any gardeners or librarians.

Son: there’s always a librarian. Just because you can’t see them doesn’t mean they aren’t there. And it’s a garden, there has to be someone taking care of it or it isn’t really a garden.

Me:

Me: this was supposed to be lighthearted

Daughter: don’t trust the secret librarian.

Son: any librarian who hoards a library to themselves is hiding something.

Daughter: /nods seriously/

Me: why are you two talking as if from experience should I be concerned

The kids are right Jazz

But what if I want to be the secret librarian?

Me: what if you were the secret librarian?

Son: wouldn’t be a secret library. I have nothing to hide.

Daughter: so not a secret librarian. A good librarian.

Me: you two are on a wavelength I can’t understand

What a way to find out your kids went on a whole-ass portal fantasy adventure at some point.

(via seananmcguire)

thecollectibles:

The Iris Den by Keira Santoso

anonymousedward:

cryoverkiltmilk:

cedarbranch:

sometimes the best fanfics are written by middle aged adults with years of writing experience who simply know how to craft a good story. but also sometimes the best fanfics are written by a sixteen year old girl with something deeply wrong with her

#fandoms need both

#biodiversity

(via ocean-in-my-rebel-soul)

scretladyspider:

the ideas that “libido and attraction can be separate and for many aces they are”, “aces who have and enjoy sex are still ace” and “aces who do not have sex and don’t want to shouldn’t be pressured” and “you should accept aces regardless of their sexual behavior” can and should coexist

(via ocean-in-my-rebel-soul)

abluerowan:

So the James Webb telescope just took a picture of a galaxy that is 29 million light years away.

If that wasn’t cool enough NASA decided to peel away all the cosmic dust in order to see the bones of the Galaxy itself.

AND IT’S BREATHTAKING

(via booklover81)

valka-arialitan:

I had to.

(via shepurdvakarian)

thecollectibles:

Doggust 2023 (part 4) by Jonathan Wesslund